My family leave for Switzerland tomorrow. On account of my week off differing from all the other schools in the world (practically), I was forced to choose my education over strapping two planks of wood to my feet and using them to make my way down a sheer mountain face… fortunately - especially after all of the fun times I’ve had learning to ski (I’m still not over the scarring from my first ever lesson. Maybe I’ll share the story once I’m over it… if that ever happens…)
As well as the perks not going on holiday with my family brings (a week home alone? partay!) there are some downfalls. Well, not downfalls exactly but my parents are taking this responsibility of being home alone very seriously… as dad proved whilst talking to me in the car:
“Okay, Maura, I know you don’t want to hear this but if the plane should happen to fall out of the sky…”
Okay… WHAT? WHAT?! I had been innocently admiring the scenery (of which there is an abundance in my town, oh yes) flash by but his words made me sit up. And for the next five minutes, I sat, face composed into something that conveyed a mixture of distress, concern and anxiety (synonyms ftw) as he explained, extensively, what would happen in the event of my family’s death.
Financially, it would be fantastic! But… his words left me begging my family not to die please. I did like having them around, however much I pretended not to.
On the upside, later on I got handed a seemingly innocent wooden ornament of a house that I’d seen practically every day since conception and informed that there was hundreds of pounds worth of money stashed in there. Basically: that money was for emergencies, the key was hidden very cleverly inside the little house and if I could find my way to the money without forcing entry I could therefore survive according to Darwin (who is 200 today. hip hip hooray!) I got in and natural selection means I win.
But yeah, my parents’ over cautiousness (which is understandable; I really appreciate how meticulous they are when it comes to holidays now) has had me slightly worried. Good job I’m not superstitious or I’d be crapping one about them flying tomorrow (check the date) …although I really didn’t need another thing to add to the little niggles at the back of my mind.
No worries, it’ll be fine… and I know all their secrets now, especially their secret stashes of dosh!
Ciao familia! Salut nouvelle richesse!
The title and signoff are both works of true genius.
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I should have known you'd appreciate it. is there anything you don't know? =P
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